Expectations

I am frustrated. I think it comes down to me having some unreasonable expectations for myself.

I just expect to go from the bottom of my potential to the top in the blink of an eye. Sloppy lazy fat girl to organized energetic cute girl overnight. I can become who I want. I can have the life I want. But jeez, it takes time!

I'm all upset with myself because I expected to do 7 loads of laundry tonight, write 35 thank you notes, clean the kitchen, clean the bedroom, take out some garbage, and then relax and watch a movie. I also thought I'd get around to baking a pie. By the way, I didn't even get home from a family gathering until 6pm. These were not realistic expectations! No wonder I fell short of my goals.

I got about 12 thank you notes written. I did 2 loads of laundry. Everything else is still a mess. But I'm very tired, I didn't get much sleep last night, and I got *some* stuff done today. I should be very happy that I started on my projects instead of procrastinating yet another weekend away.

I do feel like I spend so much time anxious and grumpy about the tremendous amount of stuff I expect myself to do that I never even start doing these things. 2 loads of laundry are manageable. 12 thank you notes are manageable. Maybe I can even straighten up the kitchen and run the dishwasher before bed. Or clean the litterbox and take out some garbage. But what I don't do, I can do tomorrow, piece by piece. And the next day. And the day after.

I need to leave more time to relax. And enjoy life. And do the other things I want to do. Little by little. Piece by piece. I have to learn to temper my expectations a bit.